ns–noun
1.
2.
the process or state of growing to maturity.
3.
a period or stage of development, as of a society, preceding maturity.
When I got to high school at age 14, I was " boy crazy". Basically that meant that I thought boys were "cute" and "liked" them. I had worn glasses since I was 8, and when I got contact lenses at 14, I felt transformed. And it was around that time that boys seemed to start noticing me, too.
The last family vacation (to Oak Creek, Colorado) I remember was when I was 14. My older sister Ellen was 16, and we had some cousins around our age. That summer we hung out with boys, somehow got into some alcohol (my first and not pleasant experience with it) and got caught. I don't know what my father did with his vacation time after that. I don't remember going back to Oak Creek, or any trips,after that.
I was a bit naive (of course), and had no idea what was in the mind of a boy. I met Mike Alsdorf when I started going to Sunset Methodist youth group. He pursued a relationship with me, and I was pleased to have a boyfriend. We dated on and off through high school, mostly on. I broke up with him a few times because my mother would say things like "there are alot of fish in the sea" which was about the extent of any advice she gave me on relationships. The only other tidbit I remember from her was when I was about to marry Mike--"marriage isn't a bed of roses". And my response at the wise old age of 19? "I know, Mother!"
Anyway, I did go out on a few dates with other guys, was generally pretty self-centered and rebellious toward my parents. Although it might be interesting reading if I got into details, I just don't think I need to spend much time here. I struggled with self-esteem, experimented with alcohol and marijuana, and now, looking back, I wish I had made different choices then, like applying myself to my studies, and being involved in extracurricular activities at school. Instead, I was an underachiever, and hung out with a bad crowd. I am fortunate that I didn't have consequences that could have affected my entire life.
My perspective on my parents now is that they probably did the best they could, given their own upbringings. I have at times wanted to be like my mother and other times still fight myself not to be like her. My mother loved her children fiercely, I have no doubt, and had to deal with the worst grief of her life when my little sister Laura was killed in a car accident at age 19. But I think she had a tendency of not wanting to deal with the bad, and stuffed alot of her feelings, and wanted to "look good" to the point of not giving enough attention to her kids as teenagers. She never talked much about her own adolescence, but the bits and pieces that I did find out through the years makes me think that maybe her family life wasn't that great. I say all that here because I think that we do tend to parent in the same way we were parented, unless we make a tremendous effort to change.
I graduated from Pasadena High School in 1974 at age 17. As a senior, I was in a work study program and was employed by Bayshore Hospital in Central Supply. I made $1.65 an hour, minimum wage, and saved most of that money. I do credit my father with guiding me into the nursing program at San Jacinto College. I paid for my own tuition and books with my savings from working at Bayshore, through the summer. I wasn't allowed to work that first semester, which was 17 hours. I then worked weekends as a student nurse/aide to continue paying for my studies. I lived with my parents until they moved across Houston in February of 1976 due to my father's transfer.
I was pretty steady dating Mike by then, and we became engaged. There was no drama or romantic proposal, it just seemed to be the thing to do. I can remember having this moment when I decided to marry him, because he never gave up pursuing me and I was tired of the games guys seemed to want to play. And I thought, at 18, that I would have to get married to be a grownup. We planned to marry when I graduated, but that date moved up when my parents moved. I lived for 2 months with the Fagan's, in Pattye's room (she lived in the dorm at U of H.) My parents paid them something. It was not a great experience. We married on April 24, 1976, and I guess that officially ended my adolescence.
